Nothing But Good News

Here is it, the 2nd official day of summer. After all the challenges I've faced over the past months, my hope has returned just as surely as the sunshine. And I have nothing but good news to report.

Despite everything, I didn't give up on school.Something I am proud of in itself since my life in particular seemed to be throwing every obstacle my way. But I didn't get distracted, I stayed focused and reasonably calm and peaceful.  I called on every resource I had, and entered into the room of the jury with my wits completly about me. Mo was with me too, I know. I thought of her continually as I waited 6 hours to play before the panel of professeurs.  I was nervous and afraid, but the moment I started playing, I was not longer in the small room in from of musiclally saturated masters of jazz. I was in a field of rolling green grass, sitting in a comfortable chair created by the smooth, amazing bass of my teacher Peter Giron.  I played from my heart. And mistakes were made, but they were forgotten with the next note. There was only me and the music. The fact that I could fnd that space under the harshes of mental circumstances, it has given me more confidence that I can explain. I did make it into the annee instrumental, exactly what I was hoping for, but the true gift I got from this year was that experience. I will never again be able to doubt myself the way I used to. I will remember that place of peace I found, and I will return there time and again. It's a place beyond time and judgement, beyond myself, beyond this world. And I do believe it was Mo who guided me there.

Last night I had a gig with some amazing musicians. I was only singing and perfectly happy to do so, since the Pianist, Wil is AMAZING and a great friend. The gig went so well. I returned to that place again, that space that consists of nothing but music, we all went there together. And not only did we have a great time and feel good about what we did, but we also got paid more than originally contracted! that's right, the bar owner was so happy with us, that he paid us each 10 euros more than promised.  What a night. My third Fete de la Musique and not only was I part of a super gig, I was paid well and treated so well, whisky and sandwiches... doesn't take much to make me happy:)

So it's decision time on whether to take the opportunity before me, stay in Paris another year for the annee instrumental or go another directions. I feel it's time to celebrate where I am, and explore my options.  But I am definitely leaning toward another year in Paris.